April 26, 2012

The Things that Keep Us Up at Night

So much is weighing on my mind lately. I wake up in the middle of the night - fists and jaw tightly clenched. This is when I visualize my happy place. A moment in time when everything was in its right place.

I find myself in Hawaii at dusk on the beach with my brand new husband. Sunburns radiating heat, snarly salty hair from a day of swimming in the ocean. Stomachs full from gorging ourselves on shrimp tacos and shaved ice. We sit perched on a stone wall watching the sun set over surfers trying to catch a last wave before nightfall. 

So much uncertainty stretched out before us.

I go there in my mind from time to time. I imagine us returning someday. Wrinkled hands holding each others' in an old familiar way. Laughing to ourselves about all of the worrying that we did. 

How funny, we thought that we could control the things that kept us up at night.


  1. My happy place is also a beach, though not any specific one. Warm sand, cool breeze, and the sound of roaring waves are all I need to feel a sense of calm.

    I wish you all the best in dealing with the things that keep you up at night.

  2. I love your photo and the description of the time you spent there with your new husband.

    My happy place is definitely on a beach with the warm sun shining down on me and a good book in my hands.

  3. There is nothing better then shaved ice in Hawaii .. I would love to go back too!


  4. What a perfect happy place. I hope everything is OK, my thoughts are with you--those long nights can be rough. Why do these things always creep in and steal your sleep?

    Hawaii. Oh, Hawaii.

  5. My happy place is the beach...always the beach. I think of it often, I try to make as many visits as I can in a year. No matter what's going on in the world, the atmosphere at the beach makes it feel like nothing matters.

  6. Sounds like a lovely happy place!

  7. That's such a beautiful picture, and the post is beautiful as well! I love it!

  8. There are two ways to look at uncertainty. Anxiety or excitement. It's all how you choose to view it.

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